How to Survive: Kicking Off the New Year

By 2018-12-20 23:26:08

With just three simple rules.

Not everyone likes to make New Year’s resolutions. Try as they might, many usually fall off the wagon within the first month, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t better ways to make life changes for a fresh start. Here are some strategies on how to survive kicking off 2018: 

1. Don't resolve to take on a stringent diet.

Instead, take some time to clean out your fridge! That soup you made last September? Toss it. That salad dressing you swore was going to get you into eating more healthy greens? Trash!

Chances are there are a lot of things in your fridge that seemed like a good idea at the time, but in reality never did you any good. And there is a 90 percent chance that one of those things was BBQ sauce.

So, go through your entire fridge, pull out all the bottles of half-used condiments, and pool them together into a giant master sauce. There’s a only a small chance you might die – OF DELICIOUSNESS!

2. Don't swear to ditch social media.

Instead, think about consolidating and cleaning up your profiles to make managing them less stressful – especially for those dry spells when you can’t connect to your VPN.

Start linking them all together so that if you post on Instagram it will also upload to Facebook. Finally update your LinkedIn profile to reflect your new full-time status as “King/Queenof China”, because let’s face it – no one back home knows any better. Don’t forget to delete that Google+ profile, because literally no one even knows what that is anymore.

Post only one thing a day – a picture of your lunch, and by the end of the week the pressure will be off. No longer will you have to keep posting regularly, as all of your friends have removed you for becoming that annoying person who only posts pictures of food.

3. Don't resolve to lose weight.

Instead, clean out your closet! Get rid of all your skinny clothes that you keep trying to pour yourself into. This will leave you with only those that fit, forcing you to love your body in the moment rather than strive to be that size 2. It will never happen when you have that awesome dumpling place just down the street.

Also, take this opportunity to finally get rid of that pair of velvet overalls. They’re never coming back in style, so stop trying to make it happen.

No matter what you do, making resolutions and breaking them is all part of kicking off a new year. Everyone does it, but you can make it easier on yourself by changing small things – not striving to do the unachievable. Take pride in the fact that you only ate one cookie last night instead of the whole row of Oreo’s. Or, even better, eat a row but not the whole box like you did last week. Baby steps.